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I’s The Bi
Bisexuals get Blatant for Pride
Robinson, Margaret. "I's The Bi." Xtra! no. 487, 26 June, 2003, p. 33.
Bisexuals are notoriously difficult to pick out at Pride. Those with same-sex partners often blend into the sea of gays and lesbians, while those who don't trigger peoples gaydar are assumed to be straight tourists.
The Toronto Bisexual Network (TBN) has been struggling with their invisibility at Pride ever since they started marching back in 1990. In the past, bisexual activists lacked an identifiable symbol. "There wasn't really any one symbol we agreed on unanimously," says bi activist Laura Jarvis. That has finally started to change.
Like all good queer subcultures, bisexuals now have our own flag, invented back in 1998 by Michael Page. A bi activist living in Florida, Page is also known for co-founding Celebrate Bisexuality Day (September 23).
The bi pride flag features horizontal bands of pink, purple and turquoise. The symbol has been quickly accepted by bi activists worldwide, making an appearance from San Francisco to Rome and from Sydney, Australia to Reykjavic, Iceland.
In addition to sporting the flag, TBN will have a truck and sound system for the first time this year. Spectators at this year's Dyke March can expect a U-Haul truck of bisexual women with signs such as "who says we can't commit?"
Marchers will also toss bi bracelets to the crowds at both the Pride Parade and the Dyke March. TBN members spent over twelve hours making bi bracelets by hand. "It was a lot of work," says Jarvis, "But it was fun and it was worth it."
Longtime bi activist Stephen Harvey agrees. "I enjoy working with others to bring to all of Toronto the existence of an organized bisexual community,' says Harvey. "Pride is, in a way, a great marketing tool for our visibility."
Visibility doesn't come cheaply. TBN has been working all year to raise money to pay for their Pride Week events. "Fundraising for queer organizations is always difficult," says Jarvis. But she notes that biphobia has had a negative impact on fundraising. "Not all queer positive people are bi-friendly," she says. "Some are afraid of being seen as 'bi sympathizers.' They're afraid that supporting bisexuals will affect how the rest of the queer community sees them."
Jarvis hopes that by becoming more visible TBN can combat some of the negative stereotypes people have around bisexuality. "It's wishful thinking," she says, "but I still hope that someday we'll be accepted."
Three years ago, TBN members were creating homemade shirts with iron-on transfers, embroidery and magic markers. "We couldn't find bi pride shirts so we made our own," remembers Jarvis.
Since then, bisexuals have been discovered by capitalism. A stunning array of bi pride pins, stickers and jewelry is available online and in local stores for just a swipe of a credit card. Want to be identifiably bisexual this Pride? How about a T-shirt that reads, "I'm not a lesbian but my girlfriend is." Or maybe you need a button that says, "Kiss me twice, I'm bisexual." And for those of you wanting to bust the myth of bisexual promiscuity, there's the "I'm bisexual and I'm not attracted to you" keychain.
It was a challenge to convince local stores to carry bi pride merchandise. "Store owners told me there wasn't a big enough market," remembers Laura Jarvis. "Basically, they were telling me that we didn't exist."
Bisexuals still have a long way to go in terms of overcoming prejudice. A study last year at the University Of California found that straights dislike bisexuals more than either gays or lesbians. In fact, compared to any other identifiable minority, sexual and or otherwise, the only group straights ranked lower than bisexuals were intravenous drug users.
But Lyla Miklos, a 28-year-old bisexual woman and queer activist, notes that the most painful rejection comes from within the queer community itself. "I've had people who have known me for years assume that I am a lesbian and then say some nasty remark about bisexuals. Some of them were on the same pride committee with me," she says.
Miklos was on the organizing committee of Hamilton Pride for the past five years. She finds that many people hold a double standard, accepting gays and lesbians automatically, but expecting bisexuals to prove themselves. "It's like I have to constantly fight for credibility within my own queer culture, no matter how much GLBT activism I am a part of. That always bites."
Stephen Harvey has been attending Pride Week in Toronto since 1988, and still encounters biphobia. Visitors to the TBN table in the Community Fair have told Harvey that he's got to choose between being gay or being straight, and even that TBN doesn't belong at Pride Week. "It happens less than it used to," says Harvey, who has been staffing the TBN table since 1991.
Lyla Miklos questions whether attitudes are changing. "I think people are better at keeping their comments to themselves," she says. "So if attacks happen they aren't as overt."
Over the years, Pride Toronto has worked hard to make their festival more inclusive. "I think we feel really strongly that Pride is something that can bring the whole queer community together," says Pride Toronto co-chair, Kyle Knoeck.
In 1995, Pride Toronto was incorporated as the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transsexual And Transgender Pride Committee. They have since elected bisexual coordinators and incorporated bisexual awareness into their volunteer training. Pride Toronto's influence at Toronto City Hall in 2001 ensured that "bisexual, transsexual and transgendered" made it into the Pride Week proclamation.
But Knoeck is realistic about changing attitudes. "That doesn't mean we've conquered the challenge of inclusivity," he says. "It's just a starting point."
He adds that making everyone feel included in Pride Week is an enormous challenge. "But it's an easy start to include 'bisexual, transsexual and transgender' in our language," he says. "We've gotten so much heartfelt feedback from people who are bi or trans and are grateful that those words are included. It's a very small thing, but I think it can make a difference, especially if it triggers the larger community to start asking questions and educating themselves."
